January 2011
My secret? I pretend everything is okay, that I’m not completely stressed out, that I don’t need you anymore.
Nothing could be farther from the truth.
All I really want is my best friend back.
It’s too bad you aren’t the friend I remember you being.
I yesterday someone asked me if I was gay. I said yes. Now I’m ‘that dyke’ and most of my friends don’t want me around anymore.
Guess what? I’ve never felt so free, light and happy. I’m going to live without the lie, deal with it!
This boy killed himself.
He had the biggest smile, wonderful singing voice, and a great sense of humour. He played rugby and was the crush of all the girls. Nobody once asked him if anything was wrong. I don’t want to be that person. Sorry for being nosy, but I’m afraid for you.
I’m not just listening to music on the bus home. I’m wondering what it would be like if everyone knew. What if everyone knew about my depression, suicidal thoughts, and eating disorder?
Would they help me, or would they run away? Would they tease me? I don’t know. But would anyone even care?
Truth is, I’m lost.
I’ve changed who I am and what I wear and say so many times just to be accepted.
I wish I had ignored them when they called me wierd for not fitting in.
I don’t know who I am anymore.
Whenever I make eye contact with someone, I’m always terrified that their first thought is that I’m ugly.
Today, My boyfriend asked me to come over just so he could see my beautiful smile and so we could cuddle on the couch. Not all boys are jerks. He’s proven this to me.
I swore I wouldn’t become addicted, I just started cutting a few days ago because I was pushed over the edge. It made me feel better.
I feel like cutting again. No, nothing traumatic just happened. It’s just a nagging need inside me. Everything is so numb. I feel dead. I want to feel the pain just to feel something. Is that wrong?
Last year, when I found out I was pregnant from rape, I sat in my bathtub with a towel wrapped around my head so when I pulled the trigger it wouldn’t make a mess. This year, I stare down at the little boy I love and the man who stepped up when he didn’t need to. I’m proud to say I put the gun down.
I don’t vote on upcoming secrets anymore. It’s too hard to click ‘no’ on a secret that means the world to someone.
Society is corrupted. Today I heard two beautiful, girls talking. One slim blonde, and one brunnette, even slimmer. The blonde taked about how she was dieting, saying “I know I’m skinny, but I could be thinner” and to that the brunnette replied “Don’t go anorexic, You’ll make me feel fat.” Help us.
Last night my boyfriend called me, crying. I have never heard him cry before. After asking him multiple times what was wrong he told me his father had been abusing him for years, and tonight he started fighting back, his dad is currently in thee hospital. Baby, thank you for finally helping yourself.
All my friends tell me I’m the best listener. Maybe if they would listen to me for once, they would be really surprised at what they hear. I help everyone with their problems, but they don’t know that mine are much worse than “which guy should I go out with?” They haven’t felt the way I feel.
This is for the guy who posted the secret about being in love with a deaf girl. A secret: I’m partially deaf with hearing aids,and it holds me back for than you’ll ever know.
My real secret: I never thought their would be a guy out there who would accept it. You’ve suddenly given me hope.
I was a cutter before I was raped. I was a cutter before my parents were killed. I was a cutter before I found out I was pregnant. I was a cutter before I was a 15 year old mom. I’m not a cutter anymore. I live for my baby girl.
My 5 year old sister just came to me and showed me her arms they had red marker lines all over it.
When I asked her what they were she said “They’re marker! Look just like yours!” she was smiling.
She has no idea mine are from blades and the red isn’t marker, it’s scabs, or why I do it.
I will never again cut.
One day, you called me.
No real reason, just to say hey. We talked for an hour.
After I said I had to go, I threw the pills away.
Now you’re keeping me living every day, just with your smile.
I won’t leave you, I love you too much.
To the person who said they have Ovarian Cancer, Stage IV.
I have Ovarian Cancer, Stage II.
I know what you mean, I really do. I’ve told only 12 friends, and my parents don’t care.
My boyfriend actually broke up with me because of it.
You’ll live. Please, please, live. I know it’s hard. I know.
I trick myself. I pretend Daddy never left us. I pretend my boyfriend never broke my heart. I pretend my sisters and I are still innocent. I pretend my skin is still smooth instead of scarred. I pretend I can’t hear Mommy cry every night. Who says grownups don’t play pretend anymore?
My Health class was watching a video about anorexia.
When the plus size models came on, all the boys went “ewww.”
And you wonder why girls starve themselves.
My secret is, that I’m dead.
I still walk around, laugh, and am happy. I have every reason to be the happiest girl in the world.
But somehow, I still feel dead. I still have suicidal thoughts. And I can’t fix it.
I’ve been raped, abused, addicted. I’ve recovered from anorexia and depression. I have been betrayed, and my heart crushed. I’ve watched three relatives die of cancer, took care of them as they wasted away. I’ve never had money or nice things. I still never considered suicide. Neither should you.
Randy is the guy who checks my arms because he saw the cuts that one time. I lied, they were not from my cat. Randy who’s emo. Randy who doesn’t ever show any emotion. You saved me, and now I’m clean.
I wake up every morning and think “Maybe today will be a good day.” And I go to bed every night wondering why someone had to prove me wrong.
Recently, our school had its annual Christmas Ball.
When a slow song come on everyone was hesitant to get up with their date. Suddenly, my boyfriend dragged me off my chair and we danced in the middle of the room then everyone started applauding.
The kicker: we are the first ever gay couple to dance at one of these events.
I don’t know how I got through all those years.
I was raped for 10 years, abused for 3, and had my life threatened. I wear scars on my arms and legs for the days I couldn’t take the pain.
Now thanks to my great friends and truly caring boyfriend I have something to live for: love.
To the six gay teens who took their lives due to bullying:
I thank you. NOT because your gone, because though it’s horrible what happened, you’ve made everyone stop and take a good look at themselves. You’ve brought actors, writers, singers, and normal people together to help fight those like you.
My friends make fun of me for reading this website every day. Maybe if just once they actually read these stories, they would realize I go on this website because for once I know someone feels the same way as me. In that one second, the world becomes a little less scary.
I always get asked if I’m high. I never am. I’m just hyper. Because I’m afraid if I stop smiling, the mask will come off and the tears will fall.
Teachers: The next time your student doesn’t turn in their homework, don’t yell at them.
Instead, please ask them why they didn’t finish it.
Their answer might surprise you.
You could save a life.
Just because he’s my boyfriend doesn’t mean it wasn’t rape.
Why do people find it so difficult to believe me?
Dad, that’s it.
If you hit mom again tonight, I’m calling the cops and hitting you back for her.
I’m not afraid anymore.
You’re almost five years older. You live in Ireland and I’m in NYC. You told me your darkest secrets.
You cared about me and trusted me. You stayed up late at night talking to me.
You stopped loving me but never specifically told me why. Now we’re just strangers.
Can’t i just know how your doing?
Last night my best friend told me I was the one that made her wanna wake up in the morning, she said I was the one that keeps her alive and keeps her fighting for life. I may be leaving for one year, and I’m scared. I’m scared that when I come back, she won’t be here anymore.
I’m the perfect guy. I hold doors open, Text girls until they fall asleep, never leave a girl/guy behind, say ladies first, protect my girls, Tell people they are beautiful, stand up for people, give a shoulder, never make any prejudice jokes,give up my seat for girls, ect. Secret? I’m straight. I’m a girl. You guys need to do better.
My boyfriend, and some of my friends, self harm, or have depression or an eating disorder.
I stay up late, even on school nights, talking them through to the morning.
And none of them know how much I need the same care and support.
The only reason I’m alive is for them.